Slosh

My recipe for slosh was given to me by Sid Green. Sid joined the crew at the Palace straight after being discharged from the Navy in 1946.

As well as the recipe for Slosh, Sid taught me just about every trick you can do with a drape from swags to tunnels & columns which came in very handy on opening night of panto at Liverpool Empire some years later. I was lighting designer and every time in rehearsals when we got to the villains lair scene, which was ironically titled 'The Theatre of Fear', we were presented with a bare stage. When I asked what we were using as a set I was told that an 'Old Time Music Hall' set had been hired from a company down south and, like the Velcro, it was coming.

By lunchtime on opening night, I was still sitting in the stalls staring at an empty stage. I looked around the place and saw the stage crew ambling about aimlessly. The red mist descended and I leaped up onto the stage and asked the stage manager what drapes they had in their concert stock? I told them to fetch everything they had and to drop in the bars which had been left free in the hanging plot for the mythical old time music hall set.

Three sets of drapes, one Tunnel, one butterfly and two swags later and there you have it. One Theatre of Fear. A couple of candelabra, a throne, dry ice and some fantastic lighting later and Bob's yer auntie.

The actual panto set had once been very grand and had been built for the palladium. This Norma Desmond of a set had seen better days, however, there was one front cloth which had been painted by a scenic artist who was clearly the Michael Angelo of Victor Mara's. You could throw any light at this thing and it came alive like you could walk into it.

I waxed lyrical about this cloth and then one day between Christmas and New Year, I bumped into Sam, the DSM at Piccadilly Station. I asked him how the run was going and he said "ok but you know that cloth you liked? Well the crew dropped a flat and it's got a hole in it" . I said "oh that's a shame. Did you just patch it from behind?". Sam replied "no. When I said it got a hole in it, I meant that you could drive a van through it!"*

Anyway. Slosh. Grate shaving sticks into a bucket and add hot water and a good splash of glycerin. Mix with a whisk attachment on an electric drill, adding shaving sticks or water until the desired consistency is reached. The glycerin takes the sting out of the soap.

I also have a great recipe for cassoulet.

*the venues Stage Manager later parted company after coming back into the theatre after closing time with his pals to show them Postman Pat's van and, after getting behind the steering wheel to demonstrate, crashed it into the safety curtain. Apparently, the first prang to Pats van. Even with that damned cat crawling all over the dashboard.